TINY GEMS

Something I’ve been pondering alot lately: how can I reconcile a genuine belief in astrology with my frankly-quite-fanatical atheism? I don’t necessarily want to believe in astrology, but I relate SO, SO strongly to being a Scorpio. It says nearly everything there is to know about me. I’m dating a Pisces who is constantly on my case about how secretive I am and all I can say is, I’m doing the best I can, man! I am a Scorpio: totally intense bitch, secret keeper, loyal yet vindictive, sometimes charming when I wanna be. Rep my fellow water signs and think Geminis are the worst kind of two-faced jerks.

Everything astrology doesn’t say, my Myers-Briggs personality profile (INTP) does:

• Highest in career dissatisfaction
• Least likely to believe in a higher spiritual power
• Lower grades than would be predicted from aptitude scores
• Difficult to get to know well
• Independent/creative/eccentric
• Obsession with “logical correctness”
• Find it extremely difficult to deal with those perceived as less intelligent than themselves

Maybe I am attracted to these systems in the same way some people are attracted to religious belief: as a way to avoid taking responsibility. In this case, responsibility for some of the darker parts of my own personality, the things I think but don’t say out loud because I know how much of an asshole I’d sound like. The secrets spelled out in my Myers-Briggs typography for everyone to see. Like the ghost of Carl Jung is staring into the very depths of my soul or some shit.

I’ve contended for the past several years that February is the dirtiest fucker of a (thankfully, short) month there is. To make February ‘09 more tolerable for myself, I’ve decided to take zero responsibility for my own actions these 28 days! I’m having my astrology.com horoscope texted to me each morning and living entirely according to what it says. “Taking steps to improve my life” one day, “going with the flow” the next. Whatever, it’s conceptual art? I’ll let you know how it went at the end of the month!

Dear reader, what’s your sign????